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[29 Dec 2005|12:19pm]

Laydees, do we realise we haven't been bitchylegendary enough to post on this even ONCE this year? In fact it was a year ago today that Rexwick posted the end of year Quiz (which by the way I really feel we should be allowed to view the answers of). Anyway, my point is that we really must try harder in the new year to do something of bitchylegendary proportions at least once a month.

Love and silky smooth wangs to all,
toth teh clovith

Poll for j00! [29 Dec 2004|09:40pm]

[ mood | bored ]

Poll #410238 QUIM!!

Album of the year

Single of the year

Event of the year

Person of the year

Rex > everyone

I wholeheartedly agree
toth teh clovith

[23 Dec 2004|08:13pm]

Last Christmas, I gave you a tart
But the very next day, You gave her away
This year, to save me on beers
I'll give her to someone special

Once beered up and glass dry,
I kept my distance but she still grabbed my thigh
Tell me baby do you think you'd blow me?
Well you charge a grand, it doesn't surprise me

(Happy Christmas!) I wrapped her up and sent her
With a note saying "Here's a tart, I shagged her"
Now I know what a fool I've been
You're actually a poof, and you like to shag men


(Oooh. Oooh Baby)

A crowded room, friends with tired thighs
I'm hiding from you and your soul of ice
My God I thought you were someone who was straight
Me? I guess I had an ass that was great
A face on a lover with a dude in his arse
A man undercover but you tore him apart
Oooh Oooh
Now I've found a real straight you'll never fool me again


A face on a lover with a dude in his arse
A man undercover but you tore him apart
Next year
I'll give her to someone, I'll give her to someone who's straight
who's straight
I'll give her to someone, I'll give her to someone who's straight
who'll give me a woman in return
I'll give her to someone
No not a jam tart!! Watch it burn!!
I'll give her to someone, I'll give her to someone who's straight
I've got a hooker here today
She can shag me for a day
I thought you were someone hetero
gave you a tart
I'll give her to someone, I'll give her to someone
last christmas I gave you a tart
you gave her away
I'll give her to someone, I'll give her to someone
toth teh clovith

[26 Nov 2004|09:55pm]

[ mood | excited ]

pineapplehead is love
brought to you by the isLove Generator
3 toth teh clovith

[09 Nov 2004|10:21pm]

[ mood | accomplished ]


7 toth teh clovith

[19 May 2004|04:30pm]

[ mood | amused ]

You won't hear about this in the media, but Rabbi Tranny Dave X. Briggs, Ph.D.'s propositions are related to the elements and bases of propagandism both organizationally and ideologically. Here's a quick review: Whenever anyone states the obvious -- that there must be some ascertainable mental block that makes Rabbi Briggs so wayward -- discussion naturally progresses towards the question, "To what depths of depravity does Rabbi Briggs need to descend before the rest of us realize we must champion the force of goodness against the greed of ungrateful firebrands?" To answer that question, we need first to consider Rabbi Briggs's thought process, which generally takes the following form: (1) We're supposed to shut up and smile when Rabbi Briggs says brutish, annoying things, so (2) the Eleventh Commandment is, "Thou shalt hijack the word 'ultraphotomicrograph' and use it to oppress, segregate, and punish others". Therefore, (3) doing the fashionable thing is more important than life or liberty and thus, (4) the federal government should take more and more of our hard-earned money and more and more of our hard-won rights. As you can see, Rabbi Briggs's reasoning makes no sense, which leads me to believe that one of the things I find quite interesting is listening to other people's takes on things. For instance, I recently overheard some folks remark that she wants us to believe that the worst classes of irritable trollops there are are inherently good, sensitive, creative, and inoffensive. How stupid does she think we are? To turn that question around, why do her minions want to ingratiate themselves with her? The answer is quite simple. I already listed several possibilities, but because Rabbi Briggs lacks the ability to remember beyond the last two seconds of her life, I will restate what I said before, for her sake: The first response to this from her faithfuls is perhaps that it's okay to fuel the censorship-and-intolerance crowd. Wrong. Just glance at the facts: She has announced her intentions to waste everyone else's time. While doing so may earn Rabbi Briggs a gold star from the mush-for-brains stoicism crowd, there are those who are informed and educated about the evils of exhibitionism, and there are those who are not. Rabbi Briggs is one of the uninformed, naturally, and that's why every time she gets caught trying to ridicule, parody, censor, and downgrade opposing ideas, she promises she'll never do so again. Subsequently, her cronies always jump in and explain that she really shouldn't be blamed even if she does, because, as they maintain, she answers to no one. It would be nice to say that haughty, incomprehensible Fabianism doesn't exist anymore, but we all know that it does. If I withheld my feelings on this matter, I'd be no less ruthless than Rabbi Briggs. Our path is set. By this, I mean that in order to tell Rabbi Briggs what we all think of her -- and boy, do I have some choice words I'd like to use -- we must develop an alternative community, a cohesive and comprehensive underground with a charter to help others to see through the empty and meaningless statements uttered by her and her helpers. I consider that requirement a small price to pay because if we can understand what has caused the current plague of superficial popinjays, I believe that we can then break the mold and stray from the path of conventional wisdom. At first, she just wanted to promote the lie of feudalism. Then, she tried to concentrate all the wealth of the world into her own hands. Who knows what she'll do next? The answer is not obvious, because she is frightened that we might take up the mantle and lend support to the thesis that I myself must certainly add my voice to the chorus of those who mention a bit about crude slobs such as Rabbi Briggs. That's why she's trying so hard to prevent whistleblowers from reporting that Rabbi Briggs is an opportunist. That is, she is an ideological chameleon, without any real morality, without a soul.

She shouldn't convince mean-spirited Luddites that there is absolutely nothing they can do to better their lot in life besides joining her. That would be like asking a question at a news conference and, too angry and passionate to wait for the answer, exiting the auditorium before the response. Both of those actions numb the public to the pessimism and injustice in mainstream politics. Rabbi Briggs's dissertations are founded on lies. I know you're wondering why I just wrote that. I'll explain shortly, but first, I should state that the irony is that Rabbi Briggs's most peevish threats are also her most ridiculous. As the French say, "Les extremes se touchent." Okay, I admit that Rabbi Briggs is capable of a large array of negative feelings. But I don't want to build castles in the air. I don't want to plan things that I can't yet implement. But I do want to demand a thoughtful analysis and resolution of our problems with Rabbi Briggs, because doing so clearly demonstrates how like a verbal magician, she knows how to lie without appearing to be lying, how to bury secrets in mountains of garbage-speak.

She would not hesitate to lock people up for reading the "wrong" sorts of books or listening to the "wrong" types of music if she felt she could benefit from doing so. Although I can no more change the past than see the future, it's safe to say that if you read between the lines of Rabbi Briggs's practices, you'll undoubtedly find that the unalterable law of biology has a corollary that is generally overlooked. Specifically, at no time in the past did addlepated election-year also-rans shamble through the streets of cities, demanding rights they imagine some supernatural power has bestowed upon them. Contrast, for example, Rabbi Briggs's insults with those of deranged meanies, and observe that there is no contrast. I, by (genuine) contrast, take the view that Rabbi Briggs shouldn't assail all that is holy. That's just common sense. Of course, the people who appreciate her conjectures are those who eagerly root up common sense, prominently hold it out, and decry it as poison with astonishing alacrity. The facts are in: For once, Rabbi Tranny Dave X. Briggs, Ph.D. should try thinking instead of vociferating.

toth teh clovith

[24 Apr 2004|01:10am]

[ mood | silly ]

I just simultaneously laughed and pouted cock out of my nose!

2 toth teh clovith

the clovis prayer [13 Apr 2004|05:58pm]

[ mood | amused ]

our father
who art in devon
tosspot be thy name
thy brothel come
thy will be done
on earth as it is in devon
give us our daily orals
and forgive us our debauchery
as we forgive those who debauch against us
and lead us not into temptation
but for shagging all others
the penetration and the orgasm
for ever and ever

toth teh clovith

[25 Dec 2003|09:44pm]

1 toth teh clovith

[23 Dec 2003|12:00am]

[ mood | accomplished ]

Clovis has ordered asked me nicely *cough* to post the following...

The Cult Of Clovis Awards

Person of the year
Best moment
Worst moment
Band of the year
Best single
Best album
Best movie
Best gig/night out
Worst gig/night out
Most f00kable person
Event of the year
Lifetime achievement

Yes, that's right, you Bitchylegends are required to vote in this. TIP: vote Cave In! plz+thx. ^.^
3 toth teh clovith

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